Hard to Make a Stand?

This weekend's New York Times and other papers reported of an argument between White House Chief of Staff Karl Rove and rockstar Sheryl Crow. According to the Times, Ms Crow had approached Mr Rove at a social dinner to discuss global warming. Crow had touched Rove's arm to talk to him about climate change, and Rove had spat back ("Don't touch me"); the argument had escalated from there.

Karl Rove got very mad at Sheryl Crow this weekend, but was Mr Rove perhaps just envious of Ms Crow's stage presence?

Exhibit A: Here's Ms Crow performing Hard to Make a Stand in summer 2006.
We got loud guitars and big suspicions,
Great big guns and small ambitions,
And we still argue over who is God
And I say, "Hey there Miscreation,
Bring a flower, time is wasting"
"Hey there Miscreation,
We all need a celebration"
And it's hard to make a stand

Exhibit B: Mr Rove recently attended the Radio-Television Correspondents Association dinner. Mr Rove joined a group of comedians in rapping on stage.

That was truly terrible. But wait... Mr Rove's performance is strangely reminiscent of a few previous hair-raising moments in home video history. Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer loved his company a few years ago, and he really out-of-breath loved it.

Ballmer is really, really frightening. But Karl Rove may also have been inspired by the Bank of America guys. We've seen this before, and it's almost too much to bear.

Now, I'm a non-native speaker, so when a White House spokesperson called Ms Crow's meeting with Karl Rove "Hollywood histrionics" I, for one, actually had to check the dictionary for "histrionics." It means "theatrical performance." Ms Crow's moment with Mr Rove was "a theatrical performance"? Compared to Mr Rove's look-I-can-laugh-at-myself rap? No comment. Men -- can anyone imagine a woman doing anything like Rove/Ballmer/BofA? Nope. No way. Never. If a woman does this, she won't be the President's right-hand woman or the CEO of the largest software company in the world. She's probably taken to - that's right, people - rehab.

Exhibit C: Britney Spears... Britney Spears went bald/ballistic/ballmer earlier this spring, and was admitted to a place called Promises.

Okay, so Sheryl Crow herself may be the first to admit it's hard to make a climate-saving stand at a White House Correspondents' Association dinner, but for what it's worth, in this video below, rocking with Mick Jagger, even Sheryl Crow's jeans make a greater political stand than Rove/Ballmer/BofA probably ever could ("we want to be rockstars" -- no, guys, but you have a lot in common in the silliness department!!!)

(This entry owes YouTube a huge debt of gratitude... Thank yous go out to all those YouTube posters out there posting these great clips...)

Entertainment Industry 101: From Humps and Lumps to Greater Meaning

It's too bad we can't draw flowcharts on Blogger, but try to picture this.

Universal Studios, like Universal Music, was until recently a subsidiary of Vivendi. We recall Vivendi/Universal Music/A&M were behind the masterful My Humps.

To service some debt a few years ago, Vivendi had to sell a majority stake of Universal Studios to GE. (You with me?) All three are looking for new blockbusters.

Now GE+Vivendi/Universal Studios have picked up a new movie called "The Peaceful Warrior." The trailer is below. The storyline is: a chance encounter with a stranger changes the life of a college gymnast ("Movies aid search for "greater meaning"" from Yahoo! news.)

It is nice if a particularly moving filming gets people thinking, and it's good entertainment, too. The business model here, though, is spelled out below by one of the companies' representatives: creating a market in transformational films.

There are a few question marks. General Electric, the owner of the company that distributes Peaceful Warrior used to produce nuclear weapons. Vivendi reaped gains from My Humps.

Additionally, although General Electric is no longer involved in producing nuclear weapons, the company owns GE-Aviation / Smiths Aerospace ("We Bring Technology To Life", a twist on GE's motto "We Bring Good Things To Life.") Although it's not clear how much of Smiths Aerospace's business comes from the defense market, much of their avionics no doubt go to the military. I once worked for a similar firm (oh, yes, I did and it's a looooooong story) and it was mostly manned by ex-military selling to the military.

Any one of us could read the Bible online, or perhaps the Dhammapada, available for free. But it wouldn't generate revenue. Quoting Reuters,

"Despite the marketing challenge, Fogelson sees further opportunity in the growing audience for such transformational films. "I think there is absolutely a viable and powerful business model in making and distributing films for this audience," he said. "I think it starts with knowing there is a large enough and very passionate audience that can be found and spoken to and served. Whether it can expand beyond that I think is entirely a function of what kind of product is created.""

Music Industry 101: Environmental Impact Assessment of "My Humps"

This is a case study of the societal effects of My Humps by the Black Eyed Peas. (The lyrics can be found here.) The album was produced by A&M Records in the US and Interscope in the UK, both subsidiaries of Universal Music Group, the largest business group and family of record labels in the industry, with approximately $5 billion revenues in fiscal 2005. Vivendi is Universal's parent company, with $20 billion revenues in 2006. The song was once called "one of the most embarrassing rap performances of the new millennium" by music critic John Bush. Much of the criticism stems from repetitive lyrics and exploitation of the female body. Regardless, this video won MTV's best hip hop video of the year award in 2006. (Wikipedia)


This would all seem too funny, if only it wasn't for...

Here's a father-daughter moment featuring My Humps.

I don't claim to understand half of these lyrics any more than these kids do. Here's a little boy's response (look for his sister trying to access the get-away car.)

Here's what happens when boys grow up a little. (Apologies in advance if it's crass; please don't waste five minutes to finish this whole clip. I didn't either and those would be five minutes of your life you can never get back.)

Here's what happens when girls grow up a little (where's their dad?)

Then the little boys and little girls grow up into men and women who try to find love and live happily ever after. We all wonder why it's so hard and would even like to believe it's because we're from altogether different planets. Bah humbug. I mean, bah hump bug.

Then it becomes an international phenomenon. This is in Serbian. Serbian!

Finally someone with a brain and some power in the industry says, I've had enough of this ----, and ... oh Alanis, you rock. You're the best. The best!

ps. Here's an article from the official journal of the American Academy of Pediatrics: "Exposure to Degrading Versus Nondegrading Music Lyrics and Sexual Behavior Among Youth."

Dare You to Move for these gorgeous sunny days.

Diamonds Are Forever

In response to Johanna's post Tuesday, here's Kanye West addressing the same issue.